Some do’s and don'ts of divorce
Jim Siemens
Certified Family Law Specialist
Like it or not, people going through a divorce may find themselves in situations that quickly become very contentious, even when both parties agree that it is in their best interest to part ways. Below is a list of “Do’s and Don’ts” from www.Findlaw.com, that might help to prevent this difficult situation from becoming unbearable.
THE DOs
DO be reasonable and cooperate as much as possible with your soon-to-be-ex. Reasonable compromise yields quicker and easier results in divorce cases.
DO support your children through the process. It is even tougher on them than it is on you. Don’t make them pick sides.
DO let your spouse know when and where you will spend time with your kids while you work out permanent custody arrangements. Your spouse might think you’ve made a run for the border – and if your soon-to-be-ex has to ask the police to track you down, that won’t look good during custody or visitation hearings.
DO fully disclose all your assets and property. A court can throw out a divorce decree based on financial deception, putting you back in court years after you thought everything was final.
Do ask your attorney if anything doesn’t make sense. Your attorney works for you, and should help you understand every part of the divorce process.
THE DON’Ts
DON’T make big plans to take a job in another state or move out of the country until your divorce is final. Your new life could interfere with getting your divorce finalized.
DON’T violate any temporary custody or visitation arrangements. It could make it tougher for you to get the custody or visitation rights you prefer.
DON’T “give away” property to friends or relatives and arrange to get it back later. Hiding property can mean your spouse can take you back to court to settle those assets.
DON’T go it alone. Divorce is complicated, and an attorney can make sure that your interests are protected.
AND A FEW WE’VE ADDED:
DO come to your meetings with your attorney prepared with updates and requested information.
DO engage the services of a therapist to help you through the emotional aspects of divorce.
DO engage the services of a therapist to help your young children understand family changes that result from divorce, and
DON’T discuss your case and/or your attorney’s advice with friends and family. Bear in mind your disclosures may create witnesses if settlement efforts break down.